(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Cambridge University researchers have discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 26 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called pillocks. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a critical morass. When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many pillocks but twice as many morons.

Made me ****ing lol

I get it lol

I don't expect alot of people to get this.

I got it... this could get controversial

i love things like this, very educational to learn about great new elements being found in our world, its always nice to know exactly how our universe works...

yeah i'm not that dumb, i got it, and still loved it, good stuff man.

loved it, your one of the few bright one's on this site

Glad to know people aren't all stuck up about the election, I respect everybodys political views all the same.

Lol, this made me laugh. Nice one Irish!

i laughed out loud to that story, i think those scientists are bsers