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Dempsey
"Let's get this done..."
— Unknown, possibly when starting a game




"Bring it, freak bags!"
— Unknown, probably randomly while killing zombies




"That was SWEET!"
— After blowing up/seeing a group of zombies get blown up




"Imagine that! We need to turn the power on; how original!"
— Starting a game




"They're swarming! Look out!"
— Unknown, possibly while fighting a large group of zombies




"Eat it, gut bags!"
— Knifing a zombie




"This just in, Dempsey is a ****in' bad ass!"
— Random, probably when killing many zombies




"OWNED!"
— After stabbing a zombie behind a window, or getting a headshot at CLOSE range




"Everything burns!"
— After burning a couple of zombies with the M2 Flamethrower. (Possibly a reference to the film "The Dark Knight". This line was said by the Joker)




"Time to cut these brainbags!"
— After getting the Bowie Knife




"Blowin' off limbs is one of my specialties!"
— After getting a shotgun




"K.I.A., Maggot sack!"
— After killing a zombie




"Can't touch this!"
— After Knifing a zombie. (A reference to M.C. Hammer's U Can't Touch This)




"JUUUIIICE!"
— After getting a Max Ammo




"Much appreciated!"
— After getting a Max Ammo




"Line 'em up!"
— After getting a Double Points pick-up




"Rack 'em up!"
— After getting a Double Points pick-up




"Gotta round up some rounds..."
— After low on/using up all of the ammo of a weapon




"Suck it!"
— Randomly while killing zombies




"Yeah! I had my eyes closed that time!"
— Getting a headshot




"Hey! Someone needs to clean up those freak bits!"
— Getting a headshot




"I told you I'm not on the menu!"
— After killing a zombie that hit him




"Oorah! They're droppin' like bad habits!"
— After killing a zombie




"Oorah! (Demonic tone)"
— After getting the Carpenter pick-up




"Oorah, Oorah, Oorah, Oorah, OORAH!"
— Getting a knife streak




"Dempsey's butcher shop is open for business!"
— After getting the Insta-Kill Powerup




"Pack-a-punch. Reminds me of a sweet chick I used to know! Hehe."
— When walking up to the pack a punch machine




"*sigh* These Wonder-Waffles [sic], Ray Guns, teleporters, Die Glockes, uhh, whatever, let's just go kill some freak bags."
— Randomly




"Gotta link up this terra..er, tele... bah... machine."
— When near a deactivated teleporter




"Anybody ever hear of a "Die Glocke"?"
— After approaching a teleporter




"This machine belongs in AWESOMETOWN!"
— After approaching the Pack-a-Punch machine




"Where's that mainframe again?"
— When near a deactivated teleporter




"I don't think it was using that anyway."
— After getting a headshot




"Hey look, it's Richtofen's brother."
— After getting the Monkey Bomb




"Monkey see, monkey go blow some shit up."
— After getting the Monkey Bomb




"Time to shock some meatbag ass!"
— After getting the Wunderwaffe out of the mystery box.




"Hi I'm Dempsey, and you are... DEAD!"
— After killing a zombie.




"Didn't anyone tell you, I'm a crack shot!"
— After Headshoting from long range.




"I must have slipped."
— after being revived




"Richtofen, that monkey's not alive. Quit talking to it!"
— Said after Richtofen receives the Monkey Bomb




"Freak-meat-bag-sackers!!!"
— after getting a kill streak




"I'll swim in your skin, maggot-whores!"
— after getting a knife streak




"I think Richtofen knows more about what's going on than it seems..."
— When approaching a teleporter




"Just what we need, a cluttered battlefield."
— After killing many zombies and witnessing the large number of corpses left behind




"Couldn't live without me, huh?"
— After being revived




"Hey, we need a clean up in aisle 4!"
— After killing many zombies and witnessing the large number of corpses left behind




"I'm surrounded! Bring it mother-****ers!"
— After being surrounded by zombies




"Poor Richtofen! Surrounded by his own creations!"
— After Richtofen is downed




"Hey Richtofen! Are you having a family reunion?"
— Randomly




Nikolai

"I need a ****ing perk. Let's go get the power back on."
— At the beginning of the game

"Ugh, I feel like I will throw up.."
— After using a teleporter

"Zombies! We gotta to move!"
— Getting overwhelmed by a large group of zombies

"Good, that ****ing song was driving me nuts!"
— After watching a Monkey Bomb explode



"Die, Hell-pig!"
— After knifing a zombie



"Balls, check. Vodka, check. Okay I'm good."
— After teleporting




"Even drunk, I am still too powerful for you."
— Random, after killing zombies





"Back in Russia, I kill bears TEN TIMES your size!"
— After getting a teddy bear




"Use it well Tank. Use it well."
— After Tank gets the Monkey Bomb





"Only man and wife should be so close!"
— After killing a zombie that has hit him






"Perhaps you are of use."
— After getting revived, possibly only said to Dempsey





"Quite an ARM-y! Get it? With the arms? **** you."
— After dismembering a zombie's arm





"****! They're between me and my vodka!"
— Randomly



"This will hurt like syphilis. Believe me, I know."
— After getting a Browning M1919





"I've got the hammer. Go find me a sickle."
— After getting the hammer pick-up (A reference to the Soviet insignia)






"In Russia, supply lines are not THIS good..."
— After getting a Max-Ammo pick-up






"Someone is not sharing their ammo..."
— After running out of ammo






"Is that a new pet, American?"
— When Dempsey gets the Monkey Bomb






"Can someone open the door to the cool gadgets?"
— When near a closed door with insufficient points






"I just boarded all the windows. Don't help or anything."
— After getting the hammer pickup





"Pack-a-punch? Oh my god, I think it makes vodka!"
— Knifing/shooting un-operated Pack-a-Punch machine







"The air reeks with the stench of dog shit."
— At the start of a hellround






"Death is inevitable, like hangovers, I know."
— When getting a shotgun





"Ha Ha, You just got ****ed by a monkey!!"
— After Throwing a successful monkey bomb


Takeo



"This will hold them back for a while! Ha Ha Ha!"
— Planting Bouncing Betties




"You are a weak fool, Nikolai!"
— Said when Nikolai gets downed




"My gun is empty. Just like Dempsey's head."
— said when out of ammo



"Nikolai has monkey. Monkey is smarter of the two."
— Said when Nikolai gets the Monkey Bomb




"The spirits are toying with us."
— At the start of a Hellround.




"My ancestors will have to wait for my arrival!"
— After being revived




"The power of my ancestors runs through my veins!"
— After killing a group of zombies




"Ahh..a small weapon, strong, fast, just like me."
— After killing a zombie with an SMG




"Do not mock me, Teddy Bear."
— After getting the Teddy Bear from the Mystery box




"Ah, the little warrior."
— After getting a monkey bomb from the Mystery Box




"One less appendage..."
— After gibbing a zombie


Richtofen

"So many body part! I am in HEAVEN!!"
— After gibbing a zombie or group of zombies




"A mere side-effect, Russian. Everything is normal..."
— In response to Nikolai complaining about the teleporter making him nauseous


Thank , Rep, Nomintate Please







"There is probably one big switch somewhere that powers EVERYTHING. We Germans are very efficient."
— At the beginning of the game.










"Doctor recommends AMPUTATION!"
— After gibbing a zombie










"You are my child. Bastard child, but child nonetheless."
— After killing a zombie.










"I require more money!"
— After trying to use the mystery box without enough money.










"There is NOTHING left!"
— After running out of ammo










"Now let's see you clap! Hahaha!"
— After getting a headshot










"Rest in peace, my little undead friend."
— After killing a zombie










"Without any bullets there can be no bullet wounds!"
— When the weapon the character is holding is out of ammunition










"Fascinating creatures, don't you think, Nikolai?"
— After Nikolai comments on the zombies.










"Play ze cymbals of death, my little monkey friend."
— After getting the Monkey Bomb.










"We will not fail!"
— Being overwhelmed by a large group of zombies










"Zombie was rude to ze doctor. Zombie paid the price."
— After killing a zombie










"I need bullets to continue my work!"
— After exhausting the ammunition for the weapon the character is holding










"Ooh, a cute little monkey bomb for ze doctor!"
— After getting the Monkey Bomb










"Maybe you move it because... you like me?"
— After getting a teddy bear in the box










"I am useless!"
— After exhausting the ammunition for the weapon the character is holding










"Once again, Nikolai leads from the front!"
— After Nikolai gets a kill


"Ahh it is still here!, err I mean what is this strange device?"
— After finding a teleporter

"The Doctor prescribes you.... PAIN!!"
— After killing a zombie

"We need to link it to the mainframe , I mean this is so confusing!"
— After activating a teleporter for the first time

"I will cut an apple with this! Ones ADAM'S APPLE!"
— After purchasing a Bowie Knife

"I'd love to bathe naked in your blood!"
— After killing a zombie.

"E-e-e-dwa-a-a-rd, your head."
— After getting a headshot.
Note: This is a reference to Doctor Maxis' assistant Edward.

"Let us all have a sing-along for the corpses!"
— After seeing the Monkey Bomb explode

"If only Maxis were here to see this."
— Upon activation of a teleporter

theres one that says
the doctor kill some takeo killed some and i kill some.what the **** do u do.
i dont rember who said it.but it was after everyone dies.