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Cant wait to read these, need a quick laugh!!:y:

Fuckin newfags.

This one time I pooped my pants from laughing so hard I then went into the bathroom and stuffed my poopy underwear in my front pocket and went on with the rest of my day.

Well, first of all, let me start of by saying my stats are about 6'0 120 lbs. Pathetic. I know. I've been like this for all my life, a walking stick. Well, I've decided enough is enough, and said I'm going to join a gym.

Well I was terrified, A skinny piece of crap like me entering a gym, everyone's going to laugh, point, and kick me out, but I just told myself, remember all the people who ever made fun of you through out life, it can't get any worse then that, and use that as motivation. So I did.

I entered the gym and my freakin legs were shaking, no joke. I have a routine that I am going to use, but today I said I'm just going to go in there and get a feel for the place, try a few excericises and gtfo. Well I walk in there, and I just see a bunch of bikes and treadmills, then the weights behind them, I was about to throw up i was so nervous, so I just jumped on the first treadmill in front of me. I turned it on, and watched the lifters.

F, these guys were HUGE. I mean MASSIVE, I said no way in HELLO am I going to go in there, so I got off the machine, and started to walk towards the door then stopped myself, I said no way, I came this far, and I'm sure they wont' really care. So I mustered enough courage, walked over there nervous as hek, and just walked straight to the curl rack.

There was an average guy next to me curling, I don't know looked about 30 lbs, so I figured I can probably do 20, so I try to pick up the 20's. AND I COULDN'T. The guy next to me was staring at me, and told me "Try something else" then points at these pink ones on the floor. Apparently his friend behind him was watching and started laughing. So I turned around and I wanted to say something, but I just couldn't, I pick up the pink dumbbells and start curling. Well his friend starts making smart remarks like "WHOA THIS GUY IS A BEAST" "AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHNOOOOOLLLD" and other things. I swear, I was getting so angry, I started to get a flashback of all the people who ever made fun of me in my life, one by one, and his voice in the background. I was steaming, all of a sudden i turn around out of sheer anger, it was as if I blacked out,and fling the pink dumbbell in his face. BAM, I HIT HIM. Then I realized, OMG DID I JUST DO THAT??!

He yells out WTF, then he pushes me against the rack, and him and his 2 friends surround me thats when I realised these were a couple of guys who were up to no good, started making trouble in my neighborhood. I got in one little fight and my mom got scared and she said "You're movin' wth your auntie and uncle in Bel-air". I whistled for a cab and when it came near the licence said "FRESH" and it had dice in the mirror but anyway I could say that this cab was rare but I thought nah forget "YO HOLMES TO BEL-AIR!" I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie "Yo holmes smell ya later!" Looked at my kingdom I was finally there to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-air

Created a much larger than expected explosion in Physics, which set off the smoke alarm. One of my fondest memories are the events that surround that incident. On a completely separate occasion, accidentally set off the fire extinguisher, foam everywhere.

In grade 8, our entire class decided to walk out one by one every 5 minutes until the teacher noticed.. We got down to 4 people left and the teacher finally caught on .
We all got suspended for a day kay: must have been fun for our teacher with no students! :ha!:

my friends and I "detonated" a fart bomb...y'know the one in a plastic bags and we didnt take a class!
Good times...