(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); ok everyone im doing a little comp and all u have to do it tell ur best joke and if it is good enough u will win 50k vbuxs the final date is the 5th of march so get the jokes in

that was horrible! yet funny..:p

---------- Post added at 04:29 AM ---------- Previous post was at 04:26 AM ----------

*This joke is all in good fun, im not raciest.

Q: Why do black people smell?

A: So Blind people can hate them too.

Little kid was given an assignment to do at school.
His teacher told him to go and find out about one character of punctuation.
The next day he came in and his teacher told him to draw his chosen punctuation on the board and tell the class a bit about it.
The kid put a period. (Full stop in UK)
"So, tell us a bit about it" said the teacher.
"Weeeeellllll... I'm not 100% sure what it is but this morning my sister missed one, my mum ran away, my dad smashed a wall and the boy next door shot himself."

ok heres mine ive got 2,

a man walks into a bar with an ostrich and a cat and he walks up to the barman and asks for a 3 beers. the barman says "that will be £3.40 please" then the cat shouts out " i aint paying for that!" so the man reaches in his pocket and pulls out exactly £3.40. and they go to their table.
5 minutes later they come back to the bar and ask for the same the cat says "i aint paying for that!" and the man pulls out exactly £3.40 again. and they go to their table. for one last time they went back up to the bar and asks for 3 beers again then the cat shouts "i aint paying for that!" then finally before they leave the barman plucks up enough courage to ask what is going on.

The man replies "well yesterday a wizard came to me and said i could have any three wishes" suprized the barman asks what they where. the man says "well my first wish was to be able to put my hand in my pocket and bring out whatever sum of money i needed.

And the final two wishes where used up when i asked for a big bird with a tight pussy...

And the 2nd one..

A man walks in a bar and notices a tiny man playing the piano, he walks over to the barman and says "whats up with the small guy on the piano." the barman replies "yeah we i have a ghini in a bottle that grants me wishes." amazed they man says "oh cool, can i have a wish?" "yeah sure" replies the barman, handing over the bottle. the man rubs it and wishes for 10000 bucks. suddenly 10000 ducks apear behind the bar. the man then shouts out "what the hell! i wished for 10000 bucks not ducks" the barman then replied "oh sorry i forgot to tell you, the ghini is a bit deaf. see why do you think i ended up with a 12 inch pianist!"...

cheers guys

why are black people so tall???


because there knee grows.
lol

Q: what do you call a black guy inbetween to houses? A: Alley
Q: What do you call 1000 black guys in a fast flowing river? A: Ribena
Q: What do you call a black guy in a cupboard? A: Black magic
Q: What do you call a black guy falling of a cliff? A: Chocolate Drop
J: Your mums that fat, ii jog around her for my excercise
J: Your mums that fat she has take a tin opener to the bath with her

Key: Q= Question A= Answer J=Joke

Why does basically everyone have to use racist jokes to be funny. (just saying lol)

Heres my joke:

So I was on this plane once, and i was sitting there and the captain gets on the mic and he does this whole "we'll be cruising at 35,000 feet thing." but then he puts the mic down forgetting to turn it off.

So he turns to the co-pilot and says "All i could use right now is a f***ing blow job and a cup of coffee."

So the stuartist goes sprinting up from the back of the plane to tell the captain the microphone is still on, and this guy in the back of the plane says:

"Hey hun, don't forget the coffee!"

=D

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

---------- Post added at 03:12 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:11 PM ----------

THE FUNNIEST JOKE IF THIS.................

Why are there no mtelephones in China?
Because there are too many wings and too many wons so they wing thw wong number!!!

wow this stuff is pretty funny lol

i got 1 its sorta racist what do nike and the kkk have in common they both make ni****'s run faster