(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); So, few people know of Garf and his epic stories. Well, that's about to change people. Garf and I were sharing stories of when we were caught masterbating, I told my Wii story, and he told me of a story of his wanking days.

Garf:

"Well, when I was younger and I used to masturbate 3-4 times a day. I used to lock myself in my room, get the porn on and bash away.
I never was prepared tho = no tissues-socks-etc. So i just used to pull my bed away from the wall and jizz down the side of it."

"So after a year of this I had built up a nice collection of dried jizz, I left home to live with my granny, my sister had my room. She pulled the bed away, shouted MUM! My mum rang me and said, come and clean this mess up you have spilt something."

"I was like "HUH"? ohhhhh shittttttt."

"I went home, cleaned it up, my Mum realised after, she said dont tell Jordan lol"

This man is a god at story telling. :y:

:bat::bat::bat::bat:What you tryin to say fool:bat::bat::bat::bat:

No offense but I just thought it was funny haha

Well he did say "Lets get the web cams out and masturbate together!!"

Now that would of been weird, gotta draw the line somewhere right?:wtf:

Don't get defensive :p I was just saying man, nothing personal. Spoke from the lurking curiosity of my mind.

Should be a movie :y:

Well, I haven't been caught yet... but, I forgot to delete the history once on my phone when my mom went to use it she went to Google and like Hot girls horny girls and shit popped up and I just said no matter how much I delete the history that shit keeps popping up.

Garf you are one epic guy :y:

I used to just beat it and ejaculate onto myself and let my mom clean my underwear mess. I felt no shame or remorse.

Seriously epic, I mean that :y: